Category: Bad Baby Names

Walkway to the Danger Zone

My dh and I really want to find a name for our child that is unique. We don’t want 5 other children in class with our son/daughter with the same name. Likewise, we don’t want to name our child something so strange that he gets teased or people just thing that it’s too bazarre! Please help by giving us your honest opinions.
Boy – Maverick David
Girl – Savannah Grace (We live in that to hookie?)

Yes. Too hookie. Make ’em a matched pair and name the girl, “Iceman.”

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Fynnygyn’s Wake

I was wondering which name you would pick out of these choices for girl Names?????
Abbey Monet
Chloe monet
Irelynd monet
Dilyn monet

And here it is again. There’s nothing wrong with giving kids Irish names except they sound like fringe characters from “Mists of Avalon.” But it’s another thing to name your kid Ireland. That’s a political statement (you don’t see a lot of Arab kids named Israel, for example.) But if there’s one thing you don’t want to do, it’s piss off the Oirish by misspelling the name of their damn country. You may as well walk into any pub in Dublin and ask, “What’s so wrong with Cromwell?”

And Dilyn…In the time it would take to come up with every way that could be mispronounced, I could find the end of Pi.

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Exhuming McCarthy

I really like Ireland as a mn. It sounds sooo cute. I like McCarthy for a boy too.

It’s always a good idea to name a kid after a fascist drunk. How ’bout Franco or Mussolini? Ivan Terribyl?

You know, I’m really starting to think these folks think words are just a series of sounds bereft of meaning.

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Militant Agnosticism

Since I know that my pregnancy, even though it was out wedlock, has been blessed, I have decided to name my child with some kind of Biblical meaning behind it.

Glad to hear God personally came off the mountain to let you know you didn’t do wrong in the face of 6,000 years of Judeo-Christian ethics, which I’m assuming you ascribe to, what with your belief in things being blessed and all. Better call the Pope. I hate to sound reactionary; I’m not rabidly for marriage or anything, but this lady’s asking for it with her God-ventrilaquist act. Hell, at least the Virgin Mary was married to somebody, even if it wasn’t the baby’s father.

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Sorry, No CODs

Prayers. Before I found out I was going to have a boy, I only had girls names chosen. If I do have a girl in the future I am naming her Aria Ocean or Aria Leilani. I love original names! :-)

Behold, the latest fad in greeting people: stating a random noun. As in, “Fishsticks. My name’s Aria Ocean and I’m a new-age CD compilation featuring 40 hits by your favorite artists. Like Enya! (Sail Away! Sail Away! Sail Away!)…”

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Curse You, Celtic Woman

May I suggest:
Calaya Tanith
Calaya Branwen
Calaya Delphine
Calaya Faerin
Calaya Gwendolen
Calaya Maeve
Calaya Magdalen
Calaya Mairead
Calaya Niamh
Calaya Nimue
Calaya Roisin (ro-SHEEN)
Calaya Siobhan (sha-VON)
Calaya Talwen
Fainne Maeve
Fainne Roisin
Fainne Tanith

No. No, you bloody well may not suggest them. Please leave us alone and resume reading “The Annotated Legends of the Runes of the Mystical Arthurian Knighthood of the Sacred Circle of the Shield of the Spell-Casting Princess Faeries of the Grail of Blackwynne Castle. Book II.”

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Lazy AND Right

We’re thinking of naming our son after his father whose name is Adjutor Joseph (last name) III.

“Oh no,” scream the citizens of Tokyo, “it’s Adjutor! He has been freed from his radiation prison on Monster Island! Only Gamera can save us now!”

Seriously, though, Joseph III was the most powerful adjutor of the Holy Roman Empire, uniting the waring families of the Venetian city-state against the forces of Count Francis dell’ Avincci in 1531. See, bet you didn’t know that.

Or that I just made that all up ’cause I’m too lazy to look up “adjutor.”

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I Like SciFi, Telegrams

My favorite name are:
Xev Chiana Louise
Nikita Gia Ravin
Gavin Charles Bailey
Tristan Michael Ares
I want kids to entire the world unique.
When they turn 18 can always change it. I hate name like Collette. She would get picked on. Kids are not always PG!

Yeah, well I like names not stupid. Names actual exist. Pronoun, verb like too. Names suggest cruel, unusual. Fourth Amendment Constitution ban ‘Nikita’ except French assassins, bald Russian guys. Friend, good! Fire, BAD!

(Helpful reader and SciFi channel viewer Joan adds that Xev is a character from “Lexx”: “She’s a virgin love slave, in love with an animate dead assasin” and Chiana is from “Farscape”: an “escaped convict, genetically altered by her home planets government to be a nymphomaniac” and spread an STD across the universe. What does this say about Mama’s ambitions for wee baby Xev Chiana? Do we really want to know?)

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A Boot, Stamping on Ys Forever

i named my daughters differently,

(as opposed to naming them the same? “…and these are my daughters, Brandy.”)

…the younger one is kryslyn (like chrislynn)

Death to all vowels! The Ministry of Truth says vowels are plus undoublethink. Vowels are a Eurasian plot! Big Brother, leading us proles to victory!

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How is Babby Formed?

I am 7 weeks pregnate and my boyfriend and I are tying to figure out a middle name for our child. what ever it might be…were not sure yet. If its a girl we want to name it Destiny or if its a boy we want to name it Tristan. What is a good middle name for the two.
Thanks Alot.

Ah, it’s always the crazy stupid ones who mess up and get pregnate. Can’t wait to see them on Springer.

When I’m Empress of Everything, the new golden rule will be You Can’t Do It If You Can’t Spell It.

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