Category: Bad Baby Names

Demon Barber of Fleet Street

I want to name my son Severin Anderson Bartlett. Are there too many syllables in this?

I think Severin is a great name for a surgeon.

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El Nombre is Dificil

Not pregnant yet but working on it!! Carlos Arturo to make Jr. Although I don’t like Arturo (North American tongue can’t prononuce)

Yeah, stupid Mexico, sitting there in North America not being able to pronounce Arturo.

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i need an artistic latin name for my baby girl who will be born in march 2002.

Well I need a million dollars and a dream date with Justin Timberlake, but you don’t hear me complaining. Hmm…latin name….how ’bout Gaius Lacivious Maximus?

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Parkway to the Danger Zone

Hunter Maverick Maarten. My little boy was named after his Daddy. My husbands middle name is Martin, we just chose to spell it differently. … I wouldn’t trade my kids for nothing. God Bless You!

Alright – does it count as naming-someone-after-someone-else if the names aren’t spelled the same? Not even vaguely the same? Answer: I does if you’re an illiterate hillbilly! No, I wouldn’t trade them for nothing. I’d trade them for a new muffler or some possom traps!

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Excerpts from Alexa Rae’s mom:

I was somewhat surprised not to see my daughter’s name in any of the above enteries. Her name is Alexa Rae… She does about 5 beauty pagents a year and for those she uses her first and middle name. That’s what we would like for her to be known to the world as….Alexa Rae is almost 3 years old now and I don’t regret our decision one bit….We’re going to get another one….My husband liked the name Shasta, but I can’t imagine naming my child after a can of soda.

I wrote out a nice long diatribe about this one, but can distill it into a single thought: This woman is a slave master. A slave master who will soon “get” a child named “Mountain Dew” and display her in a decorative case.

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Halfway to Being Pool Sharks

When we named our three sons we wanted something different. By accident they all ended up being names of cities.
Denver Kade Lional
Karson Cole Lorne
Cody Walker Royal
Their thrid names all come from family, Dad, and Great Grandpas.

I’m not seeing the city names. And I’m not seeing the accident. And I’m not seeing the need for those poncey second middle names. In fact, I’m not seeing at all. These names have made me go blind.

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Dave is a teeny bit angry

Really, this is funny and disturbing at the same time…All I can think is what a nation of retarded imbeciles we have become…and how soft and ignorant we are becoming as well. I liked the guy who asked all these women if they were intentionally paying homage to Scotland. Half of these twits were probably like “Huh???” Also, they try to give their kids really prestigious, dignified, and in some cases godly names. Imagine, though, a hypothetical conversation between parents:

“John, wake up. Heaven just crapped the bed again.”

“You’re going to have to clean it up, Mary….Destiny’s got a crayon stuck up her nose again.”

F@#$ing yuppie scum! (or, even worse, Wannabe-Yuppie Scum, like my high school friend, who is now a plumber’s helper living in Palm Bay, FL- the city with no Palms and no Bays- , and his utter bitch of a wife, who named their kids Scout and some other douchebag name that I can’t even make myself remember).

I hate them and want them to all die. I go to sign my kids into daycare, and the sign-in sheet is just pages and pages of Kyleighs and Tylers and Taylors and Morgans and McKenzies and Codys and Britneighs, and it makes me want to vomit my small intestine up for their viewing pleasure.



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Slang is Hard

One of our “requirements” for a name is that the first and middle initials will sound nice together to make a
nickname. I grew up as Brandy to some and BJ to others ….quick and easy nickname that kids may not make as much fun of.

For 15 years poor Brandy never understood why everyone snickered after calling her by her nickname. Or why all those football players asked her to prom. They were so rough in the back of the limo.

Guess they thought she was a different kind of girl.

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Snooki? Is That You?

I’m thinking of naming my son that is due here

(as opposed to somewhere else?)

in a couple of weeks Camden Trevor.

This lady goes to on say she lives in Indiana. I guess in Indiana no one’s clued them in on the whole “Everyone on the planet makes fun of New Jersey” thing. Or that there’s a Camden, Indiana.

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I was thinking of the name Blaise but I don’t know if it should be the first or middle name.

I think it should be a felony.

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