Category: Bad Baby Names

Subscribe to Ranger Rogerick

The neighbor two doors down from us has named her daughter Destinee. I’m sorry … I just do not get the trend in giving one’s daughter a name that marks her as president of the Future Strippers of America Club.

I also participate on a reproductive rights debate board. There is a woman on there with 10 (egad) kids, and not one normal name among them. The worst, IMO, is her eldest son, Rogerick. I don’t even know what else to say about that.


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She Can’t Solve It…Can YOU?

I have a “classic” for you.

I used to work in Holland, Michigan. Living next door to our business, was a wonderful family,…fun, helpful, artistic, intelligent. This couple had young two sons. The eldest went by Stu,…Stewart Douglas Baker. I never gave it much thought until his mother mentioned that he was named after a car,…Stu D. Baker!

Then she added that her younger son also had a play on words in his name and left us to figure it out. Much to my dismay, I never discovered it before they moved & we lost contact. Can you help me with this one. It has been nagging at me for five years now. What kind of play on words can come out of Phillip Morton Baker?


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That’s NoNice

I once met a lady named NoRhett. When I asked her about her unusual name, she told me that her parents had really wanted a boy, to be named Rhett after the character in Gone with the Wind. The doctor thought she was a boy, and when she arrived everyone was very surprised. NoRhett’s father took one look at his new baby girl and said “That’s no Rhett”, so they named her NoRhett. Isn’t it awful? Not only is she saddled with a terrible name, but she will constantly be reminded that her parents really wanted a boy instead.


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Ewwie, Ua!

I found your site quite by accident, but it certainly was hilarious and sad to read. And I knew I had to tell you of this name. To my shame, I invented it, but never intended it to be used!

I write science fiction stories, where it’s more “acceptable”, even encouraged to have very different names. I started publishing on the internet where I was “discovered”. And in posting my stories for others to read, I often got email about not just the stories but also the names. I would reply that I didn’t care if they used the names, but just don’t tell your kid where you got it! I don’t want to be the victim of his/her rage later in life.

Once in a humorous tale, I came up with the totally goofy, and consonant-less, name of Mr. Uaeio. It’s pronounced just as it looks (boy have you heard that a lot!)…U-a-e-i-o. Imagine my shock to hear from a lady who LOVED the name with no consonants and said she wanted to name her boy that! And she’d call him
Ua for short, which she said would be pronounced “Ew-ay”. She would not be dissauded.

And to think I started putting my maiden name with my married name so I’d be harder to find after being stalked once. There’s no Lindley-Anderson in the phone book, but I’ll bet “Ua” will find me anyway…

Keep it up because I need the laughs.

B. L.

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She’s a Little Blue

Not quite so far out there as some others, but for baby names, my favorite has to be that of Perry, the darling daughter of Mr. And Mrs. Winkle. We went to high school together.


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Ecstasy Affects Pregnancy

I had a neighbor who named her son Romance , who grow up to be a gay cross dresser. And his sister was named Love. This lady was absolutely insane. I think she was on drugs.


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The Universe’s Calmest Moderator

Horror is better when spread around. I already posted this in the forum, but here it is:

Author: chosney
Date: September 26, 2006 2:07 PM
Subject: Choosing a baby name
My wife and I are having our first baby and we are trying to think of a name Something that will portend the great thing’s that only a Chosney could. Something like Pasquale, Bush (after the pres of course), Manson, Chuck for boys name or for girls Cynthia, Butter, Angel or Cryinore.

Which names do you like?

(I assume this to be fake, but answered politely on the off chance that it was real. My head hurts now.)


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Off With Her Library Card!

I am a school librarian, and I’ve seen several bad names, but one THIS year is probably the worst…

Destiny Darling. I don’t know what her middle name is, but I’m afraid to look it up.

I also have a high school girl with the first name of Princess. If that’s not begging for trouble, I don’t know WHAT is. She does seem to feel a need to try and live up to that name, and looks down on all of the “commoners,” students and faculty alike.


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LMNO, My Dear Watson

I have friends who wanted to do something different with the names of their children. * shivers *

Jason (dad)
Nancy (mom)

When Nancy was pregnant with MacKenna, she was concerned that her daughter might think that the only reason they had her was to have all the letters (of the alphabet).


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High in Potassium

I swear this is true. A co-worker was telling us how she and her husband had almost named their daughter (whose name I cannot remember) *Chiquita Banana.* She announced this in the lunchroom one day, and we all looked at her like she had a third eye.

– Thanking my lucky stars I was named after a purple flower (Heather)

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