Category: Bad Baby Names

A friend of mine gave me the link to your site and the bad baby names page helped me to laugh away a bad morning, so thanks for that.

Firstly, I have to say, I was rather perturbed at the list of celtic-sounding names someone suggested on page 5, because my name actually is Róisín. I’m Irish (as in LIVE IN IRELAND) though, and it’s a very common (and traditional) name here, so it’s not so bad…I’m just quite disturbed at the idea of it being coupled with something like ‘Calaya’, which isn’t even a word, or ‘Fáinne’, which is the Irish word for ‘Ring’.

One of my contributions to your list comes courtesy of my friend Jack. He went to school in Camden in London, and knows a few people with truly bizarre names, like Merlyn Kingfisher Norton. Sadly, these two are people I know personally…my new baby cousin has been named Coty as in Coty L’Aimant (cheap perfume) and my neighbour’s daughter was named Shereene (prounouned Shareen). I also know of a lady from Belfast named Tamara Knight and a little boy who had the misfortune to be named the interesting combination Yehudi McGrath.

Oh dear.

Róisín

Spotted this one today in a news story.

Ti’Juana (last name)

“Not every case is the same, so policies that do not consider all the factors are inappropriate,” Ti’Juana (last name), 16, told the board.”

Ok,naming your kid after a region which is most famous for getting American college kids drunk and live entertainment which features women having sex with domesticated animals is bad enough, but the superfluous apostrophe just takes the cake.

-greg

I wanted to throw a couple names your way. There’s this girl who works at one of the grocery stores here (South Carolina) and her nametag says Trashia… I kid you not. I’m thinking it’s not pronounced how it’s spelt, they never are anyway. But just looking at it, what do you see? Trash… TRASH. Perhaps her mom couldn’t find a dumpster to put her in?

I grew up in Wisconsin and I went to school with some people who had very interesting names indeed. Here’s the worst of the them:

Cinder’ella (forget her last name)
Halania Jordan
I knew a GIRL named James (forget her last name too)
And then there was both Richard Whacker, and Richard Head.

-A

I have two (distant!) cousins, sisters in their late 40’s to early 50’s, named Sweetie Dove and Fanny Love. I kid you not.

-Veronica

I knew a girl in high school (not me! not me!) who got pregnant and her favorite name for a girl was… WHISPER HOPE. Can you imagine?! The good news is she had a boy! His name is not nearly as revolting… Tristan Nathaniel.

Thanks for all the laughs!

– Rachel

From the BBC:

‘Others are taken in by relations or guardians, like 14-year-old twins Laqwon and Raqwon Perryman. They are staying with a neighbour while their mother serves somewhere in Iraq. They have mixed feelings about her absence.’

Well with names like that, who can blame them?

Love the site! Had my entire family in hysterics, and LotD always caused great merriment.

– Katy (who used to chide her parents for making her one of the 98,253,978,134,682 Catherine derivatives that she knows, but now has cause to be grateful)

When my son was younger I used to hang out at the nearby playground every morning. There was a woman there who had a daughter named Astrid. She had a another baby, a girl, and she named her Dirtsa. Astrid spelled backwards.

-P

The administrator of the Cedars of Zion nursing home in Portland, Oregon was Richard Fuks. Imagine the awkward silences he gets when he answers the phone. “Um, hello Mr. um, mumble mumble.”

My maiden name was Sinning. There was a Sinning who was a minister and was the head of the Alchoholic Beverage commission in Iowa. The former head of the Narcotics Division of the Amsterdam police department is Paul Sinning. My maternal grandmother’s maiden name was Sinner.

-Mary

I was laughing so hard at your site my co-workers were wondering what I was sniffing!

My husband and I named our first daughter Tamalyn. She’s now 12 and, while at times it does get mispronounced, she likes her name. We thought it was “unique”, but after looking at your website, her name looks as innocent as Jane or Susan! Keep it up!!

-Jennifer

Naming kids after where they were conceived: (A friend) told me about some dopeheads who decided to do that, so they named their daughter Shenandoah Valley.

The problem was, they had twins, so ~~ sit down, take a deep breath, this is gruesome ~~ they named the other girl Country Dreaming. Now as much as I enjoy John Denver, I mourn for this little girl, because Shenandoah Valley goes by Shenan (not Shannon), and can you imagine what poor Country Dreaming gets called?

Oh my oh my

-G.