Author Archives: notwithoutmyhandbag

Okay, well, I love bizarre names and I want to name my twins-to-be some weird shit… Hannibal or Indiana for a boy, or Tsiana or Annabelle Lee for a girl. (I have one of each, yay.) Fortunately I know better than to actually DO this to my kids. But when I asked for advice on Yahoo! Answers (yeah, I know, REAL smart move there) I got… constant suggestions of… REALLY bad stuff. I can’t believe names like Madison and Mikayla are so popular. I thought Tsiana was strange, but at least it’s not the second-most-common name in the US today.

I thought I’d send some of these in for you to mock. Please, feel free to also mock Hannibal and Indy and Tsi. I know they’re ridiculous, hence why they will end up cats, or D&D characters, instead of walking people.

I said I was having twins and I got LOTS of ‘matched’ names which… I find ridiculous. They are two totally seperate people, folks, they don’t need to rhyme or have a theme or start with the same letter.

So here we have the worst that the people of Y!Answers had to offer, spelling unedited:

For girls:
Ellecia
Phoenix Rayn
Brooklyn Skye
Enya
EmmyLee
Skarlet
Ryder (for a GIRL! Are these people on crack?!)
Kabrien
Bre
Neil
Yasmin
Kaley
Breelyn
Brynlee
Jaelynn
Bryson
Sneha (I SWEAR TO GOD)
Deliaha (Not Delilah, which might be acceptable. How do you even PRONOUNCE this?!)
Aislynn
Maliah (because Malaria is just TOO COMMON THESE DAYS)
Raelynn
Jaylinn
Aienne Argelouissee (I am here on behalf of the CPUV, the Committee for the Prevention of Unnecessary Vowels, to tie your tubes.)

Tomorrow – more of Sarah’s adventures!

Boys:

Ah’Mir Antron
Antawand Syhemd
Romeao Michael

Jalen Terry
Xavyer Ellis
Kaden Robert

Tyce Lakee
Ny’Jarique Anthony
Isaiah Alfonso-Eli’Jah (attack of the random punctuation and capitalization)

Twins:
Frederick Ly-Kee & Ly-Kee Rahsaan (Were they really that stuck for a second boy’s name?)

Quinete Markel (a Jr.–some names really deserve to let die in a previous generation)

–I didn’t comment on most of the above names, they mostly stand on their own for sheer awfulness. Let me know if you use them for another page, as I’d like to read your comments.

Melissa

Was reading your site, and cracked up on most of the pages. I’m sending you a list of names culled from the newspaper announcement of birth certificates issued in the area–many are on this list due to the attack of the random “y”, capital letter(s), and punctuation.

Girls:

Mi Shonia Jai-Erra Na Veah
Marianah Renee
Shanyce Tierny Lydia
Twins (I don’t think the names are so bad for singletons, but they should not be used for siblings, much less for *twin* sisters): Emma Elizabeth & Emily Rose
Shy’Mani J’Ana Shaprieka

Ta Rae Sincendy
Diamond Rose
Demisha Denell
Shai Ann Angelique
Shantrice Dorisann

Nakea Marie Grace
Katie Elizabeth (this child will never grow up so we don’t need a name that will wear well to adult life? Please, if you like the name Katie, name your daughter Katharine and call her Katie, but give her a name that passes the “top of the resume” test)
Eternity Marie
Zyreeanah Amere
Rylee Marie

Macaila Lynn
Destiney Nyree Holly
Ka’Myra Lashea
Amani Joy
Lyndsey Fury

Nai-Jayla Amani
Zyonaha Amari-Uynque (not only is she unique, but we can’t spell it)
Anadya Marie

I went to a Waldorf School and needless to say there were a lot of names there that ranged from goofy to downright cruel (Paprika being one of the more memorable ones). However there were four siblings who take the cake, hands down. Their names? Galadriel, Bilbo, Frodo and Arwen.

Now I can imagine Arwen getting through high school in one piece, especially with her siblings to divert attention, but I weep for little Galadriel. As for poor Bilbo, well…

I remember them because their (now remarried) mother is expecting a fifth cast member. His name? David.

Damn hippies.

– C.

Hi, I just stumbled on your site, and thought it was very interesting. Personally I am a long way off from having kids but I have already chosen the names for them.

Boys:
Nekoda Isaac Nathan
Nekoda is from the Bible…not one of the many known ones but I like that you can shorten it to Nik or Cody and it can be unusual and normal too.
really can’t decide on the next one but some of the choices are:
Taze Anthony Russell
Tristan Jared (or Jacob) Alexander (T.J.)
or Christian Jared (Jacob) Alexander (C.J.)

Girls:
Zekaria Etana Gariella (French way of spelling Zechariah, and Zak can be a shortening)
Samala Aminah Michaela , Sammy or Molly maybe.
Do you think the girl names are to boyish?

-V.

I know that you are a fond collector of bad baby names and I have a few for you. I once worked with a girl named Tomar Doty. (You pronounce it like Toe-Mar) and here is one I just heard:

My brother in law and his wife are newly pregnant and are considering these names: Madison Mickey Marie, for a girl and here’s the bad one. Xeph Jared Lee. Xeph is pronounced like Zef. When they told my husband and I, we got the same general look in our eyes when we looked at each other, “I hope and pray that it’s a girl”.

I had to unfortunately burden both of my children with 2 middle names, (family tradition on his side) but my mother was no innocent to the bad name game. I have 2 sisters, Serina Rose and Niccole Delight. And yes we did call my youngest sister Nicci which would end up being a very bad Porn or stripper name if paired with her given middle name.

-L

I have a couple bad baby names to contribute.

My church is a hotspot for bad baby names. When a family had a baby girl last month, they decided to name her Campbell. Everyone was whispering, “Like the soup?”

Another couple had twins, one of each gender, and named the girl Xinah (pronounced Z-eye-nuh) and the boy Moroni.

There was also a family that used to live here with a son named Aspen and a daughter named Winter.

-A

First of all, THANK YOU for pointing out how ridiculous the names are lately! I can’t believe how many seemingly sensible people are giving their poor kids such crazy, made up non-names. Thank you!

My Dad was a teacher and had a student (a boy) named Precious Lovely. No joke. He went by P.L.

-F

I was considering naming my child (regardless of whether it is a girl or boy) one of the following:

christmas lifeguard or pocket

christmas lifeguard because one time when i was on vacation in hawaii at christmas a lifeguard saved my life, i would not be here today if it was not for her.

pocket because it sounds unique and ordinary at the same time.

-S

I read the baby names in our local paper, The Democrat and Chronicle (Rochester, NY) when they are printed each Wednesday. Several (probably 6) years ago my favorite appeared.

Mystical Mo’Cream M(last name)

I saved the newspaper for about 2 years, but threw it away the last time I moved. Hope you like it!

-Mary