I am a transcriptionist for {a company} that targets people with really bad credit. I think I can say with all assurance that it’s long past time to weep for the future of humanity. However, I get some amazing names. This just in, as I was trying in vain to stifle my insane laughter while reading
your site:

Sakeithsha Simian, of Lake Charles, LA.

Last week we had a Latisha whose name was spelled Latasshaa. And a Carlos whose name was spelled Carless. On and on it goes.

I wish I was making this up. Someone ought to beat their mothers to death with the consonant tiles from a Scrabble game, stuffed into a sock.

I live in utter terror of the day that they get the bright idea to fool around with the spelling of last names. My job’s awful enough as it is without having to fill out an app for someone named Schiyenaeiquiethaeia Smyieyaeth.

And yes, that first name I just typed in there is some poor soul’s actual name, although I believe I may have forgotten a couple of vowels. Possibly a few more “y”s. After a while, they all blur together.

I need to go get drunk now.

-D