Category: Bad Baby Names

My to-be husband has a thing for “unique” names. He likes names such as “Veto” and “Enobi“. I like what I call “cool” names. Then names such as “Kiki” and “Jack”. We were having dissagrements with baby names till I smacked him upside the head and phrohibid him from naming my children.

Well, I phrohibid you from having kids at all.

Although, it is nice to know who originated the slang use of “cool” – it’s this lady! (“They’re what I like to call –big finger quotes– COOL names.”) And now we know she’s prone to violence against her fiance for wanting to name kids Veto so they can star in Schoolhouse Rock segments about the three branches of government!

Help me, Kobi-Wan Enobi, you’re our only hope!

I knew a couple who likes baby names that are active verbs. They named their daughter Meander, she is called Mea for short. If it would have been a boy they liked the name Run. Another choice for a girl was Harmony.

OK. Number 1: Meander and Run aren’t active verbs until they’re placed with an object, as in “I meander in delirium thinking ‘Run’ is a good name.” Number 2: I dare…I double dog dare these people to name a girl the verb form of Harmony, Harmonize. I fuckin’ dare them! Then have a boy and name him Simonize. Number 3: While I’m at it, I dare them to save everyone the trouble and name Run “The Shits” instead.

I love my unique name Jetti.

I border many harbors. Sometimes I’m made of rocks and protect wharfs from the tides!

What do you think of the name ‘Fancy‘? For a girl, of course? Naomi found an egg. It hatched into a peacock. They named it Fancy!

Some lady found a Web site. She wrote a name. They named it Insanity!

(You C&W fans out there will immediately recognize this as the name of a shack-dwelling underage girl pimped by her own mother in the song of the same name.)

What I do want is a name that is unique and sounds dignified without being “laughable”. What I do NOT want is a name that is so different, it takes a lifetime to get used to. My mother did that to me and I fuss with her about it to this day (I’m almost 34). She named me Zebrena Nanzet (which is a variation of Sabrina Nanzette), which she says she found in a baby book in the late 60s. No matter how much emphasis I put on pronouncing the ‘Z’ in my first name, people have already started spelling Sabrina. Let me just tell you that I have been cursed with spelling my name everywhere I go. And I do mean everywhere.

We believe you. Poor thing. Having a perfectly normal middle name like Nanzette spelled so strangely.

i have a 20-year old son named case mitchell and an 18-year old daughter named cheyenne autumn. my daughter has some of the most beautiful red hair in the world so her name fits her to a tee.

Not only does she have beautiful red hair, Cheyenne Autumn stars James Stewart and Richard Widmark and is regarded by many critics to be John Ford’s most cynical of his later Westerns. She runs 2 hours, 35 minutes and is available on DVD.

I love the name Meloncholia Francessca Antouinette for a
girl and Zakeri Atruellu for a boy, but my family and spouse ablosute hate it.

I don’t know what his problem is. How can he be made sad by a perky name like Meloncholia?

MY first daughter name is Unique Melanie [last name] I wanted her fisrt name to be unique and she has my first name s her middle. I am 7 months pregnant and if its a girl her name will be Angel or Destiny Lanell [last name].If its a boy his name will be Maki(ma-ky-i)Donte’

Alright, I’ll give her credit for skipping to the chase and just naming the kid “Unique.” None of this Amberashlynn Daysharla crap. Save everyone the time and tell them exactly what to think. But, damn it, there’s no way on this earth you can make people pronounce Maki with three syllables. Not unless you pay everyone on earth at least $50. More to the Japanese, who will laugh their asses off that you’re naming your baby after a type of sushi.

does anyone like these names… blaine thomas tatiauna jane kendal landon chloe lynn trenton daniel kerin elizabeth

Hmm…how many rude things can we come up with to play off of Tatiauna? I got six in 30 seconds! It’s like a Boggle game!

I love the name Bretlyn Nichole for a girl and Braynt Adam for a boy my last name is [last name] so i think those names would sound good together what do yall think

I continue to pray these are horrible mis-typings. Even if that’s supposed to be “Bryant Adam” it’s horrible and mean. And if it really is supposed to be “Braynt”…I don’t want to live.