I knew a couple who likes baby names that are active verbs. They named their daughter Meander, she is called Mea for short. If it would have been a boy they liked the name Run. Another choice for a girl was Harmony.

OK. Number 1: Meander and Run aren’t active verbs until they’re placed with an object, as in “I meander in delirium thinking ‘Run’ is a good name.” Number 2: I dare…I double dog dare these people to name a girl the verb form of Harmony, Harmonize. I fuckin’ dare them! Then have a boy and name him Simonize. Number 3: While I’m at it, I dare them to save everyone the trouble and name Run “The Shits” instead.