I think perhaps my family on my mother’s side was trying to set some record for the most god-awful collection of hideous names known to man. Now, I’m all for old-fashioned names. Hell, I even sort of like the name Maud. But these are some truly terrible monstrosities.

I recall from one of your previous Letters of the Day that someone knew of two guys who worked together called Otto and Kermit. Yep, I got both of those. In the same immediate family.

Where to begin…
My grandmother’s grandmother: Huldah Bertha (wtf??)

She also has twin cousins named Lela and Leta (That’s right, Leeeeeeeee-la and Leeeeeeee-ta.) Leta married a guy named Paul, and what did they name their daughter? Yep, Pauleta. (Paul-leeeeeeeeeeeeta.)

This isn’t a relation, but a good friend of my grandmother’s is named Uldean. She married a man named Earl. They have a child (don’t remember if it’s male or female) called Earldean. Good Christ.

Fortunately, my grandmother saw fit to give her own children fairly normal names (Kathryn, Linda, and Judith), thus breaking the cycle of abuse.

-Celeste