I love late-night programming. I have to, ’cause I have DirecTV and live on the West Coast, so everything’s three hours ahead. Anyway, last night I came upon a holy revelation in straaaaaaange naming in the show guide:

“World Changers Ministries. Religion. Hosted by Creflo Dollar and Taffi Dollar.”

Clearly, I was going to have to check this out for myself.

All of two minutes of watching it, I realized it was your usual televangelist show, where the Rev. Dr. Dollar (honorary doctorate, Oral Roberts U.) tells us exactly what Jesus is thinking RIGHT NOW and how I have to trust in him (Creflo), and also Him (Jesus). Isn’t that right, Taffi? (Taffi agreed.) But on top of that, Creflo was talking a lot about my credit card debt. Apparently, if I worship Jesus, I’ll be rich. Seriously. Loving Jesus = financial gain. This is the entire point of his ministry.

(I didn’t realize all Christians are exceptionally rich. Especially last time I was in Tijuana.)

But there’s a catch. As Creflo’s website says: “Tithing is our covenant connector. Giving determines the amount of our increase.”

I know, I know – I’m as shocked as you are a televangelist is asking for money. But apparently this has worked. The Dollars have built a $20 million sanctuary complex in Georgia, and their FAQ includes:

“Do I need to present my W-2 form or the title deed to my home in order to become a member (of the church)?”

So I guess that is frequently asked.