I have a friend (or, somewhere between acquaintance and friend) who just had a baby. Thankfully, it was a boy. Her girl names were awful – the frontrunner was Starwynn…. (we pointed out that, when you reverse the syllables, it is awfully close to a minivan, but she stuck with it).

She named him Harrison, which (although a little strange) is at least a name. Unfortunately, though, at the last minute she let the ex-boyfriend add _two_ middle names, so now the poor child’s name is Harrison Dante Osiris (last name).

Once again, Dante at least is a name, albeit an old one. and maybe the child will grow up to be a great Italian poet. But Osiris? The Egyptian god of death and the underworld? Plus, the last name starts with an M, so the kid’s initials are H-DOM. which is creepy and reminds me again of that underworld….

-L